She should have been celebrating her son's 23rd birthday but instead Tina Marren was kissing the ground where his ashes lie.
It is now nine months since the sudden death of Joshua Gafney at his home in Westfield Avenue in Yeovil. His family are still waiting for their questions to be answered.
Following his death, two female nurses were arrested on suspicion of manslaughter and released on bail.
The Western Gazette understands that investigations have centred on whether Joshua was given an overdose of the drug clozapine by NHS medical staff treating him for psychosis at his home.
The Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) is still considering an evidence file passed on by the police.
Joshua's mother Tina, sister Jasmine and new nephew Leo held a vigil at his grave in Yeovil Crematorium with family members to mark his birthday this month.
His aunt Lorraine Marren said: "Instead of celebrating Joshua's birthday, nine months on from his death, we as a family sat by his graveside. We all left our messages, thoughts, tears and prayers with him.
"We then left our sister Tina alone to be by her son's side.
"I remember looking across at my sister as she kissed the ground where her son's ashes lie. The pain as a family never really goes away.
"Some days are better than others but the terrible tragic circumstances behind my nephew's death makes it so much more unbearable to deal with. The unanswered questions waiting on the CPS decision has left us numb, angered, helpless and empty."
In the months since Joshua's death, his sister has given birth to her son, Leo Joshua Mark Bailes, who is five months old.
He carries the names of his deceased grandfather Mark Gafney and uncle Joshua.
The impact of Joshua's death has had a profound effect on his mother Tina.
From her hospital bed, she told the Western Gazette: "I am very distressed as to why it is taking so long for the CPS to make a decision.
"I feel as if my son's death is not important, I need desperately to get answers for him and need for the truth to come out. Myself and daughter Jasmine have helped each other through this terrible time and have had to be strong for my grandson Leo – he deserves the best in life.
"I am in hospital and feel there is nobody to talk to about my son's death.
"In the eyes of the law I feel myself and daughter are not important. I don't know where to turn next.
"I am physically, emotionally and mentally broken. This has affected all of my family very deeply. It is unbearable. My heart is broken."
Avon and Somerset police spokesman Martin Dunscombe said the two people who were arrested in connection with Mr Gafney's death remained on police bail.
He said: "We await a decision from the CPS to see what action will be taken."
